Why I hate Dragon Age Inquisition

All the lists that cover best games in 2014 reward or at least mention Dragon Age Inquisition as one of the best games of last year.
Somewhere in December I bought my digital copy and must stay I hate the experience so far - only managed to play around 8 hours of that game. Here are my reasons (some minor spoiler may appear but don't think I'm past the proper prologue so...)

1) The most trivial start of the game since 90s. So you just wake up being accused of causing some major catastrophe and then within MINUTES you become the leader of some cult/militia because your hand glows green. Awesome.

2) Characters you don't care about. So you have your standard bad-ass bird with thick-as-fuck Russian accent. Dwarf that looks more like a douche circus-midget and completely forgettable elven mage. Why would I bother? They are just there from the very start - game doesn't give you a chance to cherish your own character then why the hell would I bother about that jolly bunch of idiots and their motivation.

3) Enforced team work. You know what I hate? Is that enforced co-op/team play. As mentioned before I don't give a damn about those other characters but I need to drag them around otherwise I get my ass kicked even by minor opponents. I do understand that NPCs are there at the very core of RPG but at least give me a choice.

4) No stash box. Now I know this might seem strange but for all RPGs what I do is hoard stuff. If you look through my lockers in Fallout you'll find 245 box car models and 400 wrenches. If you visit my manor in Skyrim you'll stumble upon an impressive 100 troll skull collection and around 900 red apples. Why do I do that? No idea. But it's always the same and applies to Final Fantasy, Souls or Persona. I simply love to collect stuff in games in hope that at one point I will unlock a special recipe for a potion that will use those fucking 100 flowers I picked up along the way or I will find a blue print for a unique gun that will make use of those mutilated body parts I collected in Fallout. Nothing like that happens here - no stash box so you need to get rid of additional gear and items. Bollocks.

5) Can't be bothered by the lore. With the trivial start the game also shovels up my throat a tone of lore. Books, letters, NPC monologues - all that to make me care about the world and it's inhabitants. Well I've been named a prophet/god/saviour in the fist 5 minutes of the game so fuck you got nothing to learn.

Now obviously it's an exaggerated rant rather than justified criticism but the game just made everything opposite to my taste. It is as if someone who hated me wanted to create a game to mock me.

With that said I was ecstatic when Bioware said new Mass Effect will be nothing like Dragon Age. I bloody love Mass Effect universe and that was the one I jumped right into and cared enough about to go through the codex, learn about different events in the world and its people. And as a playstation gamer I started with ME2 which usually would leave me detached from lore.

To sum up - all the power to those who enjoy their Dragon Age experience. I don't think I'll be bothered to finish the game anytime soon. For that fantasy experience will stick to jRPGs and Witcher while keeping my sci-fi love with Bioware and highly anticipated Mass Effect game.

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